As an antidote to cabin fever I hope you forgive my indulgence in sharing this:
Many years ago as a pre-registration pharmacist in Liverpool together with 20 or so of my graduate colleagues I attended a series of seminars at Fazakerley Hospital. The last seminar before lunch was to be on spinal chord injuries.
We started to get restless because the speaker was late in arriving. When finally he arrived the room quickly hushed to silence. The speaker manoeuvred his wheel chain to the front of the centre aisle and then with a bowling action hooked his arm behind one of the rear push handles of his wheel chair. David was a strikingly handsome man with piercing blue eyes that just melted the ladies in the audience. For a full two minutes or so he didn't say a word but just smiled and poured his gaze across his audience. Finally in his rich Scouse accent he said:
"It's alright for you blokes, you can bash your bishops any time you like. Me, the closest I get to an orgasm is when I have a shower and the water sprays on my face."
To say we were instantly captivated is an understatement. In one master stroke he had cut through the awkwardness and taboo of talking about living with and managing disability. He went on:
" You see, as a tetraplegic not only am I paralyzed from the neck down I can't feel anything from my neck down either."
From then on I got to know David very well and spent many evenings visiting him at the Younger Disabled Unit at the hospital. I remember vividly one night we went down to the hospital social centre for a pie and a pint which turned out to be a cola and a pie for me as David had to observe a strictly restrained diet on account of the severe constantly life threatening difficulties that tetraplegic patients can have managing the spasticity of their bowels and bladders. In conversation David explained how he had broken his neck.
As a happy go lucky eighteen year old David had gone on holiday with a gang of his friends to the Med. On their last day their flight was delayed so the gang decided to go back to the beach. For the past week they had been diving and jumping off of the rocks on the beach which they proceeded to do again. Tragically, as David took his last dive the sea swell dropped to reveal a large rocky outcrop which he impacted head on and broke his neck. David died twice and was resuscitated twice before finally being transferred a few weeks later by air ambulance to the UK. David freely admitted that shortly after his accident he had wished that he hadn't been resuscitated but that had changed and that he had learned to live a different but fulfilled life. He went on to explain the work that he was now doing as a counsellor and one particular story he recounted has stayed with me.
A young suicidal female patient was referred to David for counselling. David asked her why she felt suicidal and she replied because her life wasn't worth living. So he asked her want she did in her spare time and she said she did some sport and that she liked tennis. David went on to explain that he would referee the ping pong between the biplegic patients at the Younger Unit and by parking his wheel chair at the net he could exercise his neck by following the flight of the ping pong ball to and fro. Next David asked her if she had a car. Yes she said. I have a BMW to which David replied that he had his motorized wheelchair which gave him freedom which he wouldn't otherwise have but that he was peeved that he had been done by the police for going through a red light when he had been forced to use the road because the local paths were in such a bad state of repair that he couldn't use them. David then went on to ask the female patient if she had much of a sex life and she confided that she had a fella and her sex life was reasonably well fulfilled. We know how David responded to that subject
. Finally David asked the patient what she did for a living and she confessed to having a well paid sales and marketing job (hence the BMW) which took her around the country and occasionally abroad. David went on to say that he worked as a counsellor but that he didn't get paid but that was alright because the state was paying for his care, food and lodgings at the Younger Unit.
Needless to say the female patient went away with a completely different perspective on life, one which was no longer suicidal.
I was already in awe of David but for me, what really touched my heart was when I went to visit to collect him on the day he had agreed to come and speak to the British Pharmaceutical Students Association who were holding their annual conference in Liverpool that year. I entered his room to find him out of his wheel chair lying on his bed. He couldn't even turn his head to greet me as I came in and he struck such a helpless and pathetic figure so completely paralyzed and immobile that I was truly stunned. Up until that point I had only ever seen David in his wheel chair where he was able to move his arms and have what appeared to me to be a reasonable degree of mobility. What I hadn't realized was that he used his armchair to hook one arm and then used his neck to cantilever movement in his other arm much like the little wooden snakes I used to play with as a child but otherwise he had no physical control of his arms or legs whatsoever. What I also hadn't realized is the effort that it took David and a whole team of nursing staff nearly three hours in all to prepare David for his venture not to mention the small army of volunteers to transport him from Fazakerley to the students union in the centre of Liverpool. There was this man living in unbelievable hardship with all of the indignities of being so disabled and yet he would always make time for others and would always go out of his way to help people whenever he could.
An inspiration beyond words.
Would love to hear other stories of inspiration.
Many years ago as a pre-registration pharmacist in Liverpool together with 20 or so of my graduate colleagues I attended a series of seminars at Fazakerley Hospital. The last seminar before lunch was to be on spinal chord injuries.
We started to get restless because the speaker was late in arriving. When finally he arrived the room quickly hushed to silence. The speaker manoeuvred his wheel chain to the front of the centre aisle and then with a bowling action hooked his arm behind one of the rear push handles of his wheel chair. David was a strikingly handsome man with piercing blue eyes that just melted the ladies in the audience. For a full two minutes or so he didn't say a word but just smiled and poured his gaze across his audience. Finally in his rich Scouse accent he said:
"It's alright for you blokes, you can bash your bishops any time you like. Me, the closest I get to an orgasm is when I have a shower and the water sprays on my face."
To say we were instantly captivated is an understatement. In one master stroke he had cut through the awkwardness and taboo of talking about living with and managing disability. He went on:
" You see, as a tetraplegic not only am I paralyzed from the neck down I can't feel anything from my neck down either."
From then on I got to know David very well and spent many evenings visiting him at the Younger Disabled Unit at the hospital. I remember vividly one night we went down to the hospital social centre for a pie and a pint which turned out to be a cola and a pie for me as David had to observe a strictly restrained diet on account of the severe constantly life threatening difficulties that tetraplegic patients can have managing the spasticity of their bowels and bladders. In conversation David explained how he had broken his neck.
As a happy go lucky eighteen year old David had gone on holiday with a gang of his friends to the Med. On their last day their flight was delayed so the gang decided to go back to the beach. For the past week they had been diving and jumping off of the rocks on the beach which they proceeded to do again. Tragically, as David took his last dive the sea swell dropped to reveal a large rocky outcrop which he impacted head on and broke his neck. David died twice and was resuscitated twice before finally being transferred a few weeks later by air ambulance to the UK. David freely admitted that shortly after his accident he had wished that he hadn't been resuscitated but that had changed and that he had learned to live a different but fulfilled life. He went on to explain the work that he was now doing as a counsellor and one particular story he recounted has stayed with me.
A young suicidal female patient was referred to David for counselling. David asked her why she felt suicidal and she replied because her life wasn't worth living. So he asked her want she did in her spare time and she said she did some sport and that she liked tennis. David went on to explain that he would referee the ping pong between the biplegic patients at the Younger Unit and by parking his wheel chair at the net he could exercise his neck by following the flight of the ping pong ball to and fro. Next David asked her if she had a car. Yes she said. I have a BMW to which David replied that he had his motorized wheelchair which gave him freedom which he wouldn't otherwise have but that he was peeved that he had been done by the police for going through a red light when he had been forced to use the road because the local paths were in such a bad state of repair that he couldn't use them. David then went on to ask the female patient if she had much of a sex life and she confided that she had a fella and her sex life was reasonably well fulfilled. We know how David responded to that subject
. Finally David asked the patient what she did for a living and she confessed to having a well paid sales and marketing job (hence the BMW) which took her around the country and occasionally abroad. David went on to say that he worked as a counsellor but that he didn't get paid but that was alright because the state was paying for his care, food and lodgings at the Younger Unit.Needless to say the female patient went away with a completely different perspective on life, one which was no longer suicidal.
I was already in awe of David but for me, what really touched my heart was when I went to visit to collect him on the day he had agreed to come and speak to the British Pharmaceutical Students Association who were holding their annual conference in Liverpool that year. I entered his room to find him out of his wheel chair lying on his bed. He couldn't even turn his head to greet me as I came in and he struck such a helpless and pathetic figure so completely paralyzed and immobile that I was truly stunned. Up until that point I had only ever seen David in his wheel chair where he was able to move his arms and have what appeared to me to be a reasonable degree of mobility. What I hadn't realized was that he used his armchair to hook one arm and then used his neck to cantilever movement in his other arm much like the little wooden snakes I used to play with as a child but otherwise he had no physical control of his arms or legs whatsoever. What I also hadn't realized is the effort that it took David and a whole team of nursing staff nearly three hours in all to prepare David for his venture not to mention the small army of volunteers to transport him from Fazakerley to the students union in the centre of Liverpool. There was this man living in unbelievable hardship with all of the indignities of being so disabled and yet he would always make time for others and would always go out of his way to help people whenever he could.
An inspiration beyond words.
Would love to hear other stories of inspiration.
