Little Johnny strikes again

[MJBee]

Little Johnny strikes again


A primary school teacher in Killarney asked her students to use the word 'fascinate' in a sentence..

Molly put up her hand and said, 'My family went to my granddad's farm, and we all saw his pet sheep.
It was fascinating.'
The teacher said, 'That was good, but I wanted you to use the word 'fascinate, not fascinating'.

Sally raised her hand. She said, 'My family went to see the Blarney Stone and I was fascinated.
The teacher said, 'Well, that was good Sally, but I wanted you to use the word 'fascinate.'

Little Johnny raised his hand...
The teacher hesitated because she had been burned by Little Johnny before.
She finally decided there was no way he could damage the word 'fascinate', so she called on him.

Johnny said, 'My aunt Gina has a sweater with ten buttons,
but her tits are so big she can only “fasten eight”

The teacher sat down and cried.

 

[victor meldrew]

Johnny must have gone to the same school as I.
Teacher asked class to construct a sentence using the same word twice!.
Silence all around ,then Johnny up his hand up . Miss I have thought of a sentence . Reluctantly the teacher said," let's hear it Johnny". Johnny said , "My sister came home last night and said, "Dad I'm pregnant", he said "Charming effing Charming".

John Wilkinson

 

[The Hyde Ranger]

The same kid is walking down the road holding a bottle, He bumps into the local priest who asks "what's that in Your hand Johnny", "Acid" said Johnny, "ACID !" said the priest "I will swap You My bottle of holy water for Your bottle of acid ", "why" asked Johnny, " it has special powers " said the priest, " I put a few drops of this on a womans tummy this morning and she passed a baby" "that's nothing " said Johnny, "I put a few drops of this on a dog's bollocks and he passed a motorbike !!"