Things you learn from the movies Part 1

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Things you can learn from watching the movies

All telephone numbers in America begin with the digits 555.

If being chased through town, you can usually take cover in a passing St. Patrick's Day parade — at any time of the year.

All beds have special "L"-shaped sheets which reach up to the armpit level on a woman but only to waist level on the man lying beside her.

All grocery shopping bags contain at least one stick of French Bread.

It's easy for anyone to land a plane providing there is someone in the control tower to talk you down.

Once applied, lipstick will never rub off — even while scuba diving.

The ventilation system of any building is the perfect hiding place. No one will ever think of looking for you in there. And you can travel to any other part of the building you want without difficulty.

If you need to reload your gun, you will always have more ammunition — even if you haven't been carrying any before now.

You're very likely to survive any battle in any war — unless you make the mistake of showing someone a picture of your sweetheart back home.

Should you wish to pass yourself off as a German officer, it will not be necessary to speak the language. A German accent will do.

You can see the Eiffel Tower from every window in Paris.

A man will show no pain while taking the most ferocious beating, but will wince when a woman tries to clean his wounds.

When paying for a taxi, don't look at your wallet as you take out a bill — just grab one at random and hand it over. It will always be the exact fare.

Kitchens don't have light switches. When entering a kitchen at night, you should open the fridge door and use that light instead.

Mothers routinely cook eggs, bacon and waffles for their family every morning even though their husband and children never have time to eat it.

Cars that crash will almost always burst into flames.

The Chief of Police will suspend his star detective — or give him 48 hours to finish the job.

A single match will be sufficient to light up a room the size of a stadium.

Medieval peasants had perfect teeth.

Any person waking from a nightmare will sit bolt upright and pant.

It is not necessary to say "Hello" or "Goodbye" when beginning or ending phone conversations.

Even when driving down a perfectly straight road, it is necessary to turn the steering wheel vigorously from left to right every few moments.

All bombs are fitted with electronic timing devices with large red readouts so you know exactly when they're going to go off.

It is always possible to park directly outside the building you are visiting.

A detective can only solve a case once he has been suspended from duty.

It does not matter if you are heavily outnumbered in a fight involving martial arts — your enemies will wait patiently to attack you one by one by dancing around in a threatening manner until you have knocked out their predecessors.

When a person is knocked unconscious by a blow to the head, they will never suffer a concussion or brain damage.

No one involved in a car chase, hijacking, explosion, volcanic eruption or alien invasion will ever go into shock.

Police departments give their officers personality tests to make sure they are deliberately assigned a partner who is their total opposite.

When they are alone, all foreigners prefer to speak English to each other.
 
Any lock can be picked by a credit card or a paper clip in seconds — unless it's the door to a burning building with a child trapped inside.

Television news bulletins usually contain a story that affects you personally at that precise moment.

Large, loft-style apartments in New York City are well within the price range of most people-whether they are employed or not.

During any police investigation, it is necessary to visit at least one strip club.

One of a pair of identical twins is always born evil.

Should you decide to defuse a bomb, don't worry which wire to cut. You will always choose the right one.

Most laptop computers are powerful enough to override the communications system of any invading alien society.

When you turn out the light to go to bed, everything in your bedroom will still be clearly visible, just slightly bluish.

If you are blonde and pretty, it is possible to become a world expert on nuclear fission at the age of 22.

Honest and hard-working policemen are traditionally gunned down three days before their retirement.

Rather than wasting bullets, megalomaniacs prefer to kill their archenemies using complicated machinery involving fuses, pulley systems, deadly gasses, lasers and man-eating sharks, which will allow their captives at least 20 minutes to escape. .

An electric fence powerful enough to kill a large dinosaur will cause no lasting damage to an eight-year-old child.

If staying in a haunted house, women should investigate any strange noises in their most revealing underwear.

If a killer is lurking in your house, it's easy to find him. Just relax and run a bath - even if it's the middle of the afternoon.

One man shooting at 20 men has a better chance of killing them all than 20 men firing at one.

Dogs always know who's bad and will naturally bark at them

Action heroes never face charges for manslaughter or criminal damage despite laying entire cities to waste.

If there is a deranged killer on the loose, this will coincide with a thunderstorm that has brought down all the power and phone lines in the vicinity.

All Americans have phones which can reach throughout the house-even if it has a cord. If its cordless- you can pick up perfect reception all around the house...unless there is a insane killer about

Guns are like disposable razors - if you run out of bullets, just throw the gun away. You can always buy a new one.

Building ventilation ducts are always clean.

Film stars are always super-human- they never need to use the bathroom

Any computer, anywhere, even in the jungle, can hack into the most secure goverment system.

Any aliens from outer space that you meet will speak your language.

All handcuffs can easily be opened with nothing more than a paper clip.

Grocery shopping bags are made out of brown paper and there is always enough shopping to fill two bags exactly.

If your town is threatened by an imminent natural disaster or killer beast, the mayor's first concern will be the tourist trade or his forthcoming art exhibition.

Even if you've been set up for murder, been framed and you have the whole world wide police force hunting you down, you will automatically live happliy ever after as long as you break away from the police and kill the bad guy.
 
Why when the hero of the movie gets the girl at the end , it seems like they will live happily ever after, yet dosent even mention her name or remember her in sequals!

In school, teachers will always be interrupted mid-sentence by the end-of-class bell.

Never disarm a bomb unless it has one second left on the timer.
Always trust the most annoying person you can find because he/she will always survive.

If you are being chased by zombies run as fast as you can, even though they can barely walk they will still catch up with you.

No matter how fast someone runs through the woods, the killer will be able to walk and manage to get just in front of the person as they fall or turn around.

Being a camp counsellor at a summer camp is as good as a death sentence

All zombies roaming the streets have only been bit once or twice, yet when a zombie gets someone on screen they always tear them to pieces

Word processors never display a cursor.

You never have to use the spacebar when typing long sentences.

All monitors display 2 inch high letters.

You can gain access to any information you want by simply typing "ACCESS ALL OF THE SECRET FILES" on any keyboard

All computers are connected. You can access the information on the villain's desktop computer, even if it's turned off.

People typing away on a computer will turn it off without saving the data.

A hacker can get into the most sensitive computer in the world and guess the secret password in two tries.

Any PERMISSION DENIED has an OVERRIDE function.

Complex calculations and loading of huge amounts of data will be accomplished in under three seconds. In the movies, modems transmit data at two gigabytes per second.

No matter what kind of computer disk it is, it'll be readable by any system you put it into. All application software is usable by all computer platforms

Whenever a character looks at a VDU, the image is so bright that it projects itself onto his/her face.

Computers never crash during key, high-intensity activities. Humans operating computers never make mistakes under stress.

Any photograph can have minute details pulled out of it. You can zoom into any picture as far as you want to. Example: "What's that fuzzy thing in the corner?
 
You forgot one, if all else fails, turn to the dark side of the force, pull out your lightsaber and kill everyone!
 
Fris you have way too much time on your hands lol :cheers2:
 

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