How to decoke an Audi?

[midnight sun]

Sorry but I couldn't resist posting this, from an Audi forum, on how to decoke an engine.
This is worse than Varroa control!


Exclamation Hey guys, please help with my mods gone wrong.....



Hey guys, I've got a 98 1.8T. I've had a k04 and chip for a while and wanted to get more performance. I was recommended to port and polish the intake and exhaust. We found out they used abrasive material to do it like gritty sand. So I got with my friend that tunes Hondas and we decided to try it ourselves. We got a bag of sandblasting sand and hooked up into the intake and started the car. We had to hold the gas so it would run. He wanted to let the engine suck in the sand through the intake so it would port it out and then push it out the exhaust so it would port the exhaust manifold.
I was worried that it might cause problems but he figured it'd be OK as long as we didn't make boost and it get sucked in the turbo. After running the car and letting it suck in sand we got about half way through a 25 lb bag. The check engine light was on and the engine was bucking and kicking and sounding really weird. We stopped and hooked the car back up normal and took off the sand supply. We tried to start it again and it was really hard. Once started it couldn't idle and kept making weird noises. We took it out and drove it and it started to make scraping and knocking noises.
Help! Can anyone tell me what to do! My buddy only does Hondas so he doesn't know much about Audis.

His 'buddy' doesn't know about Honda's either, but I expect this guy is a REAL expert on 'weight loss' (right Hivemaker/ MCB?)

 

[madasafish]

Hmm..I take it that post was a spoof. No-one could be that stupid... surely?

 

[jenkinsbrynmair]

Hmm..I take it that post was a spoof. No-one could be that stupid... surely?

I reserve comment.............

 

[MikeT]

This must be a spoof. No one in their right mind would be so stupid. I even get worried if I am having an engine sand blasted and have not sealed up the ports sufficient well to prevent sand getting into the engine.

 

[jenkinsbrynmair]

Hmmmm
Steam irons with labels saying 'do not iron clothes whilst wearing' coffee cups with 'caution - may be hot' vehicles advising ' do not leave wheel unattended whilst using cruise control. the ist goes on and on - yep - people can be that stupid

 

[Torq]

Please tell me what forum this in on!!! I'm dying to read the replies!!

 

[MikeT]

Please tell me what forum this in on!!! I'm dying to read the replies!!

Found it http://www.pistonheads.com/gassing/topic.asp?h=0&t=462336&nmt=

Have a good laugh!!!

Also this one

http://www.audiforums.com/forum/off-topic-5/hey-guys-please-help-my-mods-gone-wrong-80267/

 

[jenkinsbrynmair]

pistonheads.com! - more like pistonbroke!!

 

[Nige.Coll]

HAHAHA
After spending most of my life building race engines and doing porting and polishing ( a thing that means little to most ) this is just another wow how dumb are you moment.
It shocks me how truly stupid some people can be.
That post is funny but I have customers who have had manifolds shot blasted and then fitted them without cleaning them with the same result.
I welded baffle plates into on alloy sump once and the owner sand blasted it and fitted it then rang me complaining his engine was ruined. I wouldn't have minded but i had polished the interior of the sump already and cleaned it.
The best one was a guy i ported a head for, he rang me and told me the head i gave him back was wrong because the pistons hit the valve springs . He had fitted it upside down.......

 

[REDWOOD]

Well the guy had the right idea but the wrong material, If you need to deglaze cylinders and free gummed up piston rings then vim trickled through your finger into the inlet manifold at half throttle will do the trick. You will be amazed how many engines I have saved that were destined to the scrap yard.

Disclaimer, this method is a last resort fix

 

[madasafish]

Hmm..I take it that post was a spoof. No-one could be that stupid... surely?

I retract the above.

He was an AUDI driver: they don't even know where the indicator switch is...

 

[midnight sun]

HAHAHA
After spending most of my life building race engines and doing porting and polishing ( a thing that means little to most ) this is just another wow how dumb are you moment.
It shocks me how truly stupid some people can be.
That post is funny but I have customers who have had manifolds shot blasted and then fitted them without cleaning them with the same result.
I welded baffle plates into on alloy sump once and the owner sand blasted it and fitted it then rang me complaining his engine was ruined. I wouldn't have minded but i had polished the interior of the sump already and cleaned it.
The best one was a guy i ported a head for, he rang me and told me the head i gave him back was wrong because the pistons hit the valve springs . He had fitted it upside down.......

See, it's possibly genuine. My mate some years ago found the 'lift pin' on a SU carburettor. He didn't know it was a 'built in' tuning aid. So he took it off, drilled out the hole and filled it with solder and sanded it nice and smooth to "aid the air flow". He never thought that the manufacturers must have put the extra effort in for some reason!

 

[itma]

2003 story.
Isn't the internet great!

 

[midnight sun]

Well the guy had the right idea but the wrong material, If you need to deglaze cylinders and free gummed up piston rings then vim trickled through your finger into the inlet manifold at half throttle will do the trick. You will be amazed how many engines I have saved that were destined to the scrap yard.

Disclaimer, this method is a last resort fix

Heard that one for diesels I must admit and the crushed walnut shells.

 

[REDWOOD]

I'v never tried the walnut shells, always out of season when I need them

 

[oliver90owner]

Redwood is right. Been used on tractors that have not been run in properly, before now. Excessive oil consumption and blow-by sorted on virtually new engines that way.