Aaargh! I’m egg blind!

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FidoDido

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I see the Queen bumbling around. I see BIASEBE (brood in all stages except bloody eggs). From tiny little pearly wigglies to big fat grubs to capped brood.

Still cannot see eggs.

I’m starting to think I’ve got some sort of disability.

Bright side - my bees are soooo calm despite my massive face being right up in their business, squinting and frowning.

I had my glasses. They didn’t help.
 
It may get easier when you have seen them once and know what you are looking for!
Find a frame with young larvae, preferably in the centre of the frame. Shake the bees off it and get it into good light eg sun behind you. Look progressively further out from the larvae maybe with a hand lens, if the queen has a good laying pattern this is where you are most likely to spot them. Bear in mind they are stuck in the bottom of the cell by the tip and stick out from it, so a very small visual target.
 
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Did you get yourself a bright led picket torch?
No - not yet. The suns really bright here though - wouldn’t that be enough?

I thought I saw some at one point but I’m pretty sure it was nectar shining because they all looked exactly the same.
 
Honestly I was so close up I could hear their little bodies brushing up against each other. I got briefly worried when I noticed them appearing to have some sort of fit here and there but I think they were dancing at each other.
 
No - not yet. The suns really bright here though - wouldn’t that be enough?

I thought I saw some at one point but I’m pretty sure it was nectar shining because they all looked exactly the same.
Buy a large magnifying glass and use that in addition to your glasses. Just hold it between the frame and your veil to focus on the eggs. If you are not used to using one, practice on a frame or object before trying on a "live" frame to get used to using one. Probably something around a 6X (that might be too high) but you should test/try before you buy. I know I had one that wasn't powerful enough but I'm not sure on the magnification of the later, better one sorry. It only cost just four or five dollars at a local shop. Don't get one with low magnification.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Magnifying_glass
 
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Take a picture on your phone of where they are likely to be and then zoom in on the picture. I won an argument doing this with a very experienced master beek who insisted that a colony was Q- because there were no eggs. There were and seen easily on the pictures.
 
I see the Queen bumbling around. I see BIASEBE (brood in all stages except bloody eggs). From tiny little pearly wigglies to big fat grubs to capped brood.

Still cannot see eggs.

I’m starting to think I’ve got some sort of disability.

Bright side - my bees are soooo calm despite my massive face being right up in their business, squinting and frowning.

I had my glasses. They didn’t help.
Same here, still don't have 'egg eyes'.
Got a good led torch, magnifying glass etc and still have trouble !
 
If you can see 1/2 day old 'wigglies' you had eggs 1/2 days ago so don't stress while you try to find the knack of egg spotting. You'll get there. Can anyone local give you a hand? Seeing eggs as pointed out by another beek will help you to get your eye in. It can just be a matter of how you hold the frame and the angle compared to your eyes and your light source/the sun.
 
You can use the hive tool to fold the cell walls aside so that plenty of light falls on the eggs. When you can see the egg on the bottom, practice seeing the eggs in the cells next to…
 
And it is easier with new frames. If you can see that the honey rim goes down the sides, then there could well be eggs in the oval area with "empty" cells
 

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